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Sita froze as she heard his refusal echo in her head. "I will not take her with me! I just cannot!.... NO! You need to understand!" Rama's voice echoed all around. She felt tears beginning to swim in her eyes. She couldn't even bring herself to look up at him. She had loved him with all her heart, and she would never betray him. Why didn't he believe that? Why was he treating her in this manner? She had done nothing wrong. She felt a tear sliding down her cheek as she felt herself begin to crumble. No. She refused to let this break her. She had been through so much recently. She had dealt with the kidnapping and worst of all with Ravana. This is what she was getting in return. She immediately composed herself as she reached up to wipe the tear. It was now or never. She couldn't take it anymore.Sita walked up through the trees to Rama and placed her hand on his shoulder. He turned around and immediately stiffened. There was something different about Sita. Some new confidence about her. She had a sudden change in her demeanor. She seemed a bit different, although he couldn't put his finger on it. "Rama, I can prove that what you are thinking isn't true. Nothing has changed. However, I do have one condition which I won't be able to tell you until I prove myself," she said with clarity. He simply nodded and stepped back from her.
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| A Scene From The Reenactment of the "Agnipariksha", Source:theboldindian.com |
She turned around and bowed her head in a prayer to the God of Fire. She prayed for him to keep her safe if she hadn't done anything wrong. She opened her eyes to a large, rectangular pit of fire before her and without any further hesitation she walked into it. She had made it to the middle when the she found a man standing in the middle of the fire beaming at her. It was the God of Fire before her. He turned her around and presented her to Rama. She looked up to see his proud face filled with happiness. "I always knew you could do no wrong, but I needed to prove to everyone else this simple fact as well," he clarified. He walked over to her to hug her when Sita stopped him. All the people gathered around seemed even more shocked than Rama. "I believe we had an agreement," she stated.
"Anything you desire my dear," Rama said.
"You felt the need to prove to everyone that I had done nothing wrong, but if you had faith in me I do not understand how anyone else mattered. I believe that you did what you felt was right, but now I must do the same. I cannot stay with you any longer. I do not wish to have to prove myself to others or even you for the rest of my life. So, all I am asking for in return is for you not to stop me." She finished her declaration with a step away from Rama. She looked to see his heartbreak show in his face. He looked down at the ground and whispered, "As you wish." She turned around and began running. As she ran away, she felt herself free for the first time. She smiled as she continued running as far as her feet would take her. This wasn't an ending, but a new beginning for her.
Author's Note:
I didn't completely agree with this specific scene in the book. I don't find it necessary to worry about what other people think. We should do what we believe in and what our heart allows us to do. We shouldn't bother ourselves with ridiculous notions of how others will react. The only thing that should have mattered in this situation, in my humble opinion of course, is that Rama believed Sita was pure and that should have been the end. I don't believe that anything else should have mattered. This is why I chose to give Sita an ending that while proving her innocence allowed her to be free as well. She can now live life according to her terms without having to prove anything to anyone. I think that in this way she is standing up for herself and allowing herself to be happy and content.
This story is very special to me, because I have found myself fighting or what I believe in during various circumstances. It is unfortunate that even today there are many cultures and places that look down upon females. These cultures place men on a higher status above women. I think that it is important for a woman to show the people around her that she is in charge of her own destiny and is capable of taking care of herself. In this story I allow Sita to make that choice and empower people to make a choice for themselves.
Bibliography:
All information has come from Narayan's Ramayana, (link to Reading Guide A)
Hey Sahra, I completely agree with you on this topic. If he believed in her and their marriage he should have known that she was still pure and did nothing wrong. She did not asked to be kidnapped and taken by another man. This was not her fault and she still get doubted on and was asked to prove herself in front of everyone.
ReplyDeleteYou've definitely removed some of the cultural and historical aspects of the source material in an interesting and you've really done a great job of maintaining the stylistic form the source. I really like the changes you've made. They definitely add a seriously different meaning to the piece that sends an entirely different final message. It was a fun read. Thanks for sharing it!
ReplyDeleteEmpowerment! I like the twist you've added to this story, and I agree with you, that is was bothersome that Rama's reaction to her was cold and in sole consideration of what others thought of her, instead of what he thought of her. Sita took her own reputation back into her hands, proved Rama wrong, and then set off on her own course. You did a great job creatively re-interpreting the story, I appreciate this different perspective on it.
ReplyDeleteP.S. The source for your photo (www.TheBoldIndian.com) was an interesting click.... I spent some time poking around there, so thanks!
First off, I really enjoyed which part of the Ramayana you chose to manipulate. I chose the same one which just speaks that we have similar tastes in subject matters. I really enjoyed your twist on the story. When reading this in the Ramayana, I was shocked that it was such an important to Rama that Sita proved her purity. In the end, I thought Sita taking her fate into her own hands was a great way to finish. Great job!
ReplyDeleteChills. You gave me chills! This was fantastic. The best part was when she walked into the fire, was proven innocent and then Rama went to embrace her and she stopped him. I immediately was shocked and on the edge of my seat waiting to find out the reason for her actions. And then when she was running I just felt so empowered myself. I could literally feel the freedom she felt through your words!
ReplyDeleteI was confused because I don't think I have read this part of the book yet. I am a little behind. Still trying to catch up! I didn't know why Sita had to prove herself. What had she done wrong? Or what had she been accused of doing?
What if Rama would have run after her? Even though she asked for him to let her go. Maybe not run after her right then but tried later to get her back? They were so in love initially I feel like it would have been so hard to just deny the love they felt. Maybe Sita would have ended up taking Rama back. I feel like they make such a great pair but also seeing Sita be free and break from Rama is more dramatic and interesting in my opinion.
Sita CLAPPED RIGHT BACK. A few of my stories also focus on how illogical Rama's responses to finding Sita are. I love how you turned her supposed "purification" into a story of liberation. Sita is just as holy as Rama is, and deserves to be treated with the same respect that Rama is. When she isn't, it should be no surprise to anyone that she decides to leave.
ReplyDeleteYessssss!! This story in the Ramayana was probably my favorite because of the emotions it brought up inside me. I also chose to rewrite it but wow, you did it way more justice! I LOVE that Sita proved herself but made the "breakup" her decision. What a powerful ending! I wish this was the real story in the Ramayana instead! Great Job!!!
ReplyDeleteI love this version of the story because you're right. Rama did not believe Sita and it caused her so much heart break. Read your author's note before I read your story and I was wondering how you were going to retell this story. I think you did a really good job with it. I especially loved that she didn't regret leaving him. She was finally free and in the original story, she does leave him, but she doesn't have to go through the pain of being banished here.
ReplyDeleteI just went to your most recent story since you didn't write one for this week and there wasn't one for last week! I love your retelling of this part of the story. I also had issues with this part, since I didn't think that Sita should have to prove herself to the people. Rama's viewpoint should have been the only one that mattered. I like that you made her suddenly gain confidence in herself and take charge of her own life. Great job!
ReplyDeleteYou did a great job of showing exactly how Sita felt when Rama told her that he doubted her fidelity. In the original epic, Rama's doubting and his subsequent testing of Sita seem to be treated rather matter-of-factly. I'm sure that in ancient India, such a test would be seen as perfectly reasonable. Now, it seems like Rama and Sita's relationship isn't very strong if she has to literally walk through fire in order to prove her devotion.
ReplyDeleteThere really isn't much that I think you should change. The only things that I can think of are minor things, like formatting. In the last paragraph, both Sita and Rama have lines of dialogue. These lines of dialogue should probably be set off from the rest of the paragraph. It would make it easier to read. There are several other places where a character speaks, but their lines are separated from the descriptive passages of the paragraph.
This story is really awesome! I love how you changed it. I agree that Sita does NOT need a man! She is fierce and Rama really has not done that much for her. The way it ended would definitely change up the epic! In your version, there are no sons that keep on telling the tale of the father. I don't think they have to do that either. The ending leaves me wanting to know more about how the epic has changed because Sita is independent and no longer depending on a man!
ReplyDeleteHi, Sahra! I too felt like the book shed a dim light on Sita. I did not understand why she had to prove herself to everyone even though she was the one who had to go through the trouble of being kidnapped by Ravana. I love how you managed to truly capture Sita’s true feelings and portray that to the audience. Your use of language to describe her demeanor really showed me how she truly valued who she was and wouldn’t let anyone else change her mind about it. I still wonder why Rama so desperately needed to gain the trust of others when he already knew that his wife was innocent. That also leads to me wondering why people needed to be so nosy in their business. Oh how the times have not changed, haha.
ReplyDeleteI just have one revision for you.
She felt a tear sliding down her cheek as she felt herself begin to crumble.
The repeated use of the word “felt” makes the sentence not flow as well. I would suggest changing it to, “A tear slid down her cheek as she felt herself crumbling inside”.
Overall, great ob with your story! I enjoyed it.
Wow, I love what you did with this story! I really like that you took the original epic, but incorporated the more modern emotions of being in relationships (if that makes sense). That is something that I think about a lot when I am reading for this class. I am constantly asking myself how the females feel. They get put through a lot and treated downright horribly sometimes, but never seem to lash out any emotion like you would typically expect today.
ReplyDeleteIn my writing, I’ve often tried to write things from the females’ points of view. It might not be exactly how they would have felt, but I like to use my imagination.
I think that your story is right on track for what Sita would have been feeling. Your opening sentences made my stomach drop. I can’t even imagine hearing the love of your life say those things about you! I thought your opening paragraph was fantastic. It was very vivid. The ending paragraph was just as strong. I loved how the story progressed from a moment of weakness to a moment of power.
I love what you did here. I can’t wait to read more from you!